How to Overcome Struggle and Build Self-Confidence to Achieve Personal Success to Become a Great Media Guest

Todd: He was your boyfriend?

Susan: Yeah, I had a boyfriend in high school and he was number one. Not my father! (laughs)

Todd: No, I know. No, I know that. Yeah, that’s what I meant.

Susan: It was, I had a boyfriend and he was number one and number two, and then we were number one doubles.

Todd: Yeah, that’s awesome. The way you carry yourself, I’m really impressed with the way you live your life, honestly. I’ve done a lot of studying on you and watched a lot of videos about you and read a few articles about you. Have you always been this confident, strong, powerful woman? As you were growing up, talk about some of that, how you were feeling back then, and maybe some of the struggles and how you overcame those.

Overcoming Struggles: Build Confidence Through Competence and Practice.

Susan: No, I still don’t see myself as, as confident. And I’m kind of a worrier. I think that part of learning all of these practices is to dispel the worry and anxiety. I think I’m a natural fretter. So, do I have confidence? I think the research has shown that competence builds confidence.

I think I have – because I know how to practice – I was raised playing classical music. That’s practicing. When I became interested in tennis, I became crazed about tennis where I went to a tennis camp and I practiced so much and was so devoted that they asked me to come back and teach when I was 16. So, I think it’s that a kind of devotion. And then I apply the same thing to media training. It’s like practice, iteration and practice.

When I was growing up, I went to three different high schools. The first was one of the best in the United States in Highland Park, Illinois. The second was one of the worst in the United States. It was where – I don’t know if you remember, what was the name of the movie? The Exorcist. It was our priest who had his tongue cut out, from The Exorcist. And this school was, at that time, there were race riots and there were gun searches in the locker, you know, they searched your lockers for guns and they were trying to do integration very unsuccessfully.

I’ve always been very sportsy, the captain of the volleyball team, tennis, badminton, all of that sort of thing. We were playing volleyball and the black girls were on one side and the white girls were on the other. The black girls always won, and I thought, this stinks and I hate losing. So, I plopped myself over on the black girl’s side – to their dismay! And they were all over me: You better not make a mistake, you better not make us lose, what are you doing over here anyway?

Taking Matters into Your Own Hands Gets Results.

I just ignored them and played. And I was pretty good, so they let me stay. I thought: If the school is going to be doing integration, why aren’t the teachers encouraging that? I thought: Well, I’m just going to take this into my own hands and do it myself! Eventually, more white girls came over to the black girl’s side. We had more integrated practice. And I sort of followed the same thing when I was getting my teaching credential for high school.

I asked them to open up Mission High School in San Francisco because nobody else wanted to go there, and I wanted to have an experience of diversity. And that wasn’t even a word then, but there were kids who came over in boats from China and from the wars in El Salvador at that time. And there were kids who hadn’t even seen a pencil before coming into the classroom. They opened up the school for me and I started teaching those kids.

Practical Life Lessons For Struggling Kids.

Part of what I taught them was just practical things because I thought: These kids are not going on to college. I love Shakespeare. I majored in Shakespeare, but they don’t care about Shakespeare. Can I make it relevant? Yes. But let me teach them how to look someone in the eye, shake their hand and get a job. I started working on really practical things, incorporating that into the curriculum. And that’s one big dream that I have is to bring – now it’s called EQ, emotional intelligence – in school.

Along with Aikido, the practice that I do in martial arts, which is really about love, compassion, understanding, and accepting people as who they are. That’s really the basis of the martial arts. And that has been used in peace practices, even in the Middle East, to bring people together. So that’s my dream, to bring Aikido and communication practices to high schools.

Todd: Wow. That’s beautiful. Did you start doing that when you were younger? I mean, was that one of your goals to get a black belt?

Persevere Through Adversity, Even When You’re the Worst Kid on the Mat.

Susan: No, I started at 56.

Overcome struggle by persevering through adversity

Todd: Really?

Susan: Yes. And it took me, what was it? Six years or eight years to get a black belt. But here’s the thing, Todd. As I said, I came from an athletic background, but I was the worst kid in the class in Aikido because it’s so different than tennis. Hand eye co-ordination, hitting a ball, or badminton, that sort of thing is your whole body. And it’s three dimensional.

But there’s so many different aspects of Aikido that I couldn’t even rock it. But I saw it.

I took a leadership course and there was a guy who actually had his black belt test. That’s when I first saw the Aikido. And I’m like, wow, this is for me. And I don’t know what’s involved, but it was so beautiful and elegant and transformative. I thought: I want to incorporate that into my practice as a media trainer. I was so bad that people ran in another direction to not train with me. You have to bow into a person next to you on the right or the left. People would get up and run away.

Todd: What? Oh man!

Susan: Yes, it was horrifying! You asked me if I was confident? Every night my sweetie would say to me – because I would cry every day after practice – I never cried on the mat. But when I was in my car, I would cry. I’m so bad at this. It’s so beautiful. I want to be good at it. And this is so horrifying to be rejected over and over again. And I want to do this so much. I cried every single night in my car for years. And my sweetie would say to me: Don’t hurt anyone and don’t get hurt. And soon, you’ll have your long black skirt.

You Are Now Entering the Realm of Being Able to Be Taught.

We have a Hakama, which is like a long black culotte. And he would say that to me every day when I left for Aikido. And I thought: Just continue to do this and be devoted. I went two hours a day, every day, for four days a week. And I’m still not – it’s not pretty! I’m a black belt, but that just means – in our vernacular – just means now you are ready to be taught. You are now entering the realm of being taught when you’re a first-degree black belt.

Todd: Yeah. Wow. Because you hear black belts like, oh, wow, man, this woman. But I love how I didn’t realize that now you’re ready to actually now be taught.

Susan: That’s the philosophy. You finally entered the realm. So, you know, while it’s a great accomplishment, what you see when you see really great black belts, what you’re seeing is people who are third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh degree. That looks really beautiful.

Todd: Beautiful. Thanks for sharing that. That’s really interesting and really neat. You keep using the word devotion. You’re a very devoted person. Obviously, it doesn’t mean you don’t have your struggles, which you just mentioned, which again, makes me realize you’re human, just like all of u. But you just keep pushing through and doing certain things. So, after you got through with high school, did you go to college? And then what got you into like being a media trainer?

Struggling to Find My Place: How I Married Communication and Sales to Go into PR.

Susan: I did go to college. I went to UC Santa Barbara and UC Berkeley and majored in English and Shakespeare, which is very useful in the real world, right? And then I worked in advertising for a while because I thought I wanted to write and create ad copy, and I just found that wasn’t really my world. I actually worked for a couple of startups, one that got acquired by MCI Sprint. I sold automated building controls, which is smart buildings, for hundreds of thousands of dollars in Silicon Valley, to companies like HP (Hewlett Packard).

And then from there, I thought let’s make the marriage of sales and communication. I thought maybe PR is what I want to go to. There was this woman in my writing class and she was working for Bill Graham Presents and the North Face. And she I just said, “Hey, can I shadow you?” Baptism by fire. I just went over to her house and started watching what she did.

Sometimes you need to go through the fire to overcome your struggles

Baptism by Fire: You Learn By Doing.

And she said, why don’t you give it a go? And I’m like, well, can I see you do it first? She said, “Get on the phone and start booking people!” Radio, TV, print. And I’m like, can I see you do it first? I just watched her and jumped on the phone. Cause I was used to doing that as a salesperson. I started doing it myself. One of my first clients was Missy Park of Title Nine sports, who is now one of the largest retailers of women’s sports clothing. But at that time, she was one person in a warehouse, and I started building my business there.

And when you said struggles, well, I was living in San Francisco at the time. I took a job at a law firm for the receptionist. And I said, “I’m going to be the best receptionist you ever had, under one condition though. When I have spare time, I’m allowed to make calls, PR calls, and I can then use all of that time to build my business.” And the HR person said yes. So, I built my business.

I paid my rent by being a receptionist. And for some reason, I have a really great memory for voices and faces. I pretty much knew all of the clients and their voices on the phone immediately. I could create that kind of rapport. So, that’s how I built my PR business in terms of doing the media placements, which is booking people on Larry King, The Today Show, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal and all of that. What I found was that I got all these great placements for people, but sometimes what happened was a great, big, nothing.

You Need to Work PR So It Can Work for You.

My clients were saying, well, Susan, I got in The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, but nothing happened for my business. And I’m thinking, that’s not my fault, I did the booking. I started listening to what they said. I started really hearing that it wasn’t something that was going to connect with their audiences. And that’s when I started media training them, which makes a difference.

Lots of people, when they say PR doesn’t work, it’s not that PR doesn’t work. It’s sometimes they don’t work. Like what you and I talked about, my life is my message. Everything you do, say, are, and think needs to be in complete alignment for things to line up and work for you. If something’s out of place, if the look and feel of your website or you doesn’t match, people pick that up, and then they don’t want to do business with you. So that’s what I work with people on in the background.

That’s part of my martial arts training. It’s part of the teaching tennis. It’s like everything lining up, you know, internally as well as externally. We really work on that fundamental level in terms of mindfulness practices, internal practices that we do before you reach out to the media. And then, what do you do when you’re actually in an interview, that kind of role play. We do both. So it’s building your mental muscle memory and skills, behind the scenes, like a meditation practice or other practices that you build that internal fire. The internal strength. Mental agility and an internal strength.

You’d be surprised how far you can get when you start asking for things on your own terms, even in the media. #BusinessInsights #EntrepreneurshipLife

Asking for Things on Your Own Terms.

Todd: Dang, that’s powerful. What strikes me right now is that again, going back to just being determined. Like you said, when you got that job: I’ll be the best at what I do here, but as long as you’ll allow me to make some calls and do these things. That’s a pretty bold thing to do.

Susan: I didn’t think about it like that at the time. I just thought, there’s no way I’m just going to be a receptionist, you know what I mean? After having a high-powered job in sales and everything, you know what I mean? People would ask, why are you a receptionist? And I’m like, well, cause I’m building this other business. It was my base.

But I really, I really believe in asking for things on your own terms. Like even when you have a job where you’re working with someone else, you want to make your way and say what your, of course, what you’re going to do for them, but how you want to build yourself as well, because you’re building yourself to help whoever. If you’re working with somebody, build their business. And if it’s your own business, you’re building yourself for those kinds of skills to have that. So, I never thought about it as being bold, but you named it as bold. I didn’t think about it like that. I mean, maybe just because I’m kind of blunt.

I always tell my media training clients to ask themselves: What is my goal? And can I do it, even if it’s scary in the moment? #SuccessStories #BusinessInsights #Leadership

We Are All Equal Heads of State.

Todd: Well, I think it, it just goes with who you are. You speak your truth, even going back to, like you said, living your life without strings attached. It’s like: You know what? This is what I want to do. This is where I’m going. And I’m just going to let people know this as I go along my path of my life. That’s just interesting. I’m watching these things just kind of fall into place as you’re talking.

Susan: So interesting. And you say that, cause that’s kind of the role that I played in our dojo, because I have kind of a big mouth. People criticize me for that, that I wasn’t respectful enough to the masters or our teachers. I think what my parents taught me and that I really internalized is that everyone is equal heads of state. I’ve taught tennis, too. When I taught at tennis camp, I taught kids of heads of state and movie stars.

Do What You Need to Do to Overcome Your Struggles.

My parents taught me to talk to anyone and not pay attention to quote unquote rank or place in society. And I think that that kind of training, I’m a trained extrovert. I’m actually an introvert, but my parents really taught me to look someone in the eye, shake their hand, have a conversation, find out about them. I think that extended.

And what I was saying about being on the Aikido floor is there’s so much politics and patriarchy everywhere. It’s in businesses, but it’s also where I didn’t really know it would be. And it’s mostly a male dominated industry, right? But I didn’t realize how much politics and how much planning and kind of negotiating there was on the dojo floor in terms of people, rank, and respect to the teachers and all of that sort of thing.

It’s not that I didn’t respect the teachers. It was that my goal is to get better in Aikido. So, whatever I needed to do, like I was going to ask for help. If that meant volunteering – the Sensei knew – to be made a fool of. The Sensei knew that if he wanted to demonstrate things and nobody would come up, I would do it to look stupid, because I wanted to learn. That was my goal, is to learn. Like, at one point he said, “Susan, come up here and demonstrate.” And he showed how he could hold me down with one finger on my arm and I couldn’t get up.

And he said, am I hurting you? I said, “Just my pride.”

Don't let pride get in the way of overcoming your struggles

If You Never Ask, The Answer is Always No.

Todd: Wow. I love that. That’s amazing. I love what you said there too, about you don’t know unless you ask, right? The power of asking, just like the answer is always no, unless you ask, right? It could still be no, but at least you ask the question.

And surprisingly, like even when I’m doing this podcast, I’ve reached out to some high-level people on a whim. The answer is no, if I never ask. At least I can ask and maybe they’ll still say no. But it’s interesting. I’ve gotten a lot of yeses.

Susan: Well, I bet you have. Yeah. Which is really cool.

Todd: And I just love that philosophy that you’re talking about. It’s like, you know what? I’ve been taught to ask. I’m going to ask, “Hey, I want to do this. Let me try this again.” I look at that as bold. I think it’s bold that you do that. And I think that’s a good way, too, that we all should be a little bit more like that.

Susan: And it’s scary. I mean, I recognize that it can be really scary.

Todd: Right.

Susan: And, and I think I’m always looking at what is my goal? And, and even though it’s scary in the moment, can I do it? And I can’t always do it.

Todd: Right.

Achieving Your Goals: What You Need is Spirit.

Susan: Oh, I mean, it’s not like I have 100% success record, but I have that spirit. That spirit that, if this is the goal that I want, what am I willing to do to get it? And consistently asking. In martial arts as well, the guys would stay late and afterwards, even though I was super, super bad, I thought, well, there doesn’t seem to be any rules to who can stay late and train. I just always stayed. And so, the guys had to train me, and they eventually accepted me because I was an eager learner.

And even though I was really bad and it must’ve been really frustrating to train me. I mean, one guy who was helping me in my second queue test. You have to go through – there’s eight queues or seven queues before you reach black belt, seven different levels.

And he was teaching me and he just started shouting at me because he was so frustrating. And I finally said to him, “You’re trying to help me, but shouting at me, I really can’t learn that way.” I said, “So please, here’s how I learn. Tell me to do one thing at a time.” Because Aikido was so complicated and he was telling me ten things. Tell me one thing at a time, tell me where to put my feet, then tell me where to move my body. And I said, “This is how to teach me. ‘Cause otherwise I’m not getting it.” And he calmed down.

But I think that’s part of the asking too. It wasn’t working for me, and it wasn’t working for him, too. To teach him: he’s doing it in the best spirit, but it wasn’t really helping me.

Would you rather work through tough questions with a media trainer OR on camera in front of millions of people where the possibility for shame is magnified a hundredfold? #BusinessInsights #BusinessMentor

The World Keeps Spinning Until Someone Dares to Make It Stop.

Todd: Wow. I love that. You’ve created this amazing business. With all this experience you had growing up, and the things you’ve already explained to us, you’ve been named one of the top 10 media coaches by Huffington Post. Tell us about your business. You wrote an amazing book called Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul, you do one-on-one consulting, you help so many people. Tell us how you got that started and kind of what you’re doing today with that.

Susan: I’ve always worked with socially conscious entrepreneurs, people who are making a difference with the world’s most pressing problems. But that can also mean a fabulous chocolate bar, to sort of balance out the heavier stuff like gender inequality. I had one client who the first autistic lawyer, a woman lawyer in her twenties.

Todd: Yeah.

Susan: For example, she was saying why aren’t people like me creating these diversity courses? People who are neurodiverse should be creating the neurodiverse courses. That makes sense. But that’s not how the world works, until somebody changes it. I work with people, so their message has real meaning, and really lands when they do. And whenever there’s a podcast, a panel, print, radio, or TV, I work with them behind the scenes to prepare for those individual interviews.

Iteration and Role-Play: The Key to A Successful Media Appearance.

And then we iterate what we were talking about before we practice, we do role play. It’s real-life situations, what this would be like and looking at where all your trigger points are. You work through those with me versus on camera in front of a million people, or, you know, in print, you get print on print in Forbes or Inc, and you can never take it back.

You can ruin your reputation in a moment. I work with people; they build their business and brand and the perception of them is what they want in all of those mediums. I work either one-on-one with people or they can take the Zen of Fame course. And, um, I have lots of free things on my website, prsecrets.com: videos, special repo rts, masterclasses, all those things are free as well. That’s where you start.

Everything You Show the World Needs to be In Alignment.

Todd: That’s a beautiful website, by the way.

Susan: Thank you.

Todd: Again, aligns up with who you are, right?

Susan: Because beauty and elegance and that kind of feel, richness that kind of abundance; I wanted to feel cozy and abundant. So, thank you for that. I really appreciate it.

Todd: I was watching something where you were explaining about if you want to have a successful interview. One of the things you said that really stood out to me was that you need to give to get, what are you going to give to get back? Explain that because I really love that principle. I share it with my own clients about if you want to be, give it away, so to speak. And that’s kind of what, that principle I learned, which changed my life in so many ways. But I’d love to hear your thoughts on that.

During a media appearance your job is to connect with your audience by asking the question: what am I here to GIVE? #publicspeaking #PR #EntrepreneurGoals

Susan: So most of us are self-conscious, and we’re nervous because we’re thinking about what people think of us. But if you can flip it in two ways, like EM Forrester said: Only connect. So your job is to connect with your audience and to ask the question.

The Question is What Do You Have to Give.

It’s a simple question: what does my audience need to know now? And how can I help? What can you give? If the question is: what am I here to give, what can I get with the gifts and the abilities and the magic that I have, what can I deliver that connects with the audience that I’m trying to connect with? So, that’s always the question versus, what can I get back from that? Of course, we all want things back, and I ask all of my clients, three questions.

Number one is what’s your big vision? How do you want to serve? Number two is what do you want for yourself? Professionally, personally, physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually, because PR can open up all of that. We really look at the whole picture of what you want, and then what do you want my audience to do? What action do you want them to take? And that’s the energetic connection between people because you want the people who resonate with you. So, when you were talking about my choice for the law firm, we are doing an exchange. It’s got to work for both of us.

You Need to Give to Get Back from Your Audience.

When I’m looking at a job or a client I’m looking at are: we a good match? Not: can I sell them – is this going to make both of us deliriously and deliciously happy, working together? And can we accomplish what they want? And more? Sometimes when I ask my clients to rate me on a scale, we’re rating the call together on a scale of one to 10.

Some people say 1000, so they got more than they imagined, because we don’t even know what our great capacities are together to reach the other person’s goals. That’s what I’m looking at, how can I help you go where you want to go, and beyond? Where you can’t even imagine that, right? Let’s expand the beyond, do you know what I mean?

Overcoming Struggle, Building Self Confidence and Success

Todd: Absolutely.

Susan: So, the job of you and I is to show people, just expand their own vision. Some people have a vision. I’m like, Well, wait a minute, is that big enough? Is that big enough for what you really want? For your work in the world, for your work on yourself? Because when we talk about Gandhi’s message, my life is my message. Jim Rohn said it best. He said, If you work on a job, you can make money, but you if you work on yourself, you can make a fortune. And he’s not just talking about money. Yes, he’s talking about the riches within each of us working on ourselves.

Change Yourself So You Can Change the World.

So, when people say they want to change the world, they have to change themselves. First, it’s not the world, right? It’s the internal shifts. Just like with my Sensei, I want to embody his qualities. I studied and always positioned myself right behind him. I could see my body and his body, to take on that kind of transmission. And that’s where can we get those transmissions, I wish it were that easy.

I remember reading a book, it was about Russians and how they could put their hand – Russian spy stuff – put their hand on a book and get all of the information out of the book; I wish that were true, I tried it. But I feel like we can do that with people, we see a quality, we can embody the quality. But it’s not always instant, it takes practice to embody that quality.

How to Center Your Energy and Passion.

Todd: I love that. That’s beautifully said. You talk about embodying things and wanting to mimic certain things, what does your day look like? How do you keep yourself centered, so to speak. And with this energy and this passion that you have in the devotion, you have to your work, the big job?

Susan: Because I’m highly sensitive, and I was thinking about this, Todd. I actually started meditating, I was really young. I was in church, and I was looking at a candle. Suddenly, I wasn’t there anymore. I felt this deep love and deep sort of expansiveness. I didn’t know it was meditation, I didn’t know what it was. But I realized that that was the first experience of not being completely in my body.

And by the way, I guess the rebelliousness started early because I refused to go to confession. I thought, why do I have to talk to a priest? Why aren’t I talking directly to God? Why do I have an intermediary? I said to my mom, you can make me come – she made me come and sit in the pew. You can make me go in the booth, but I’m not gonna say anything. I’m here to tell my quote, unquote, sins directly to God, and have a direct contact communication. I started exploring that and exploring Buddhism.

Struggling Through the Day? The Importance of a Solid Morning Routine.

My daily practice starts before I get out of bed. I do a number of practices, because once I’m out of bed… I was just talking to my BFF, we studied meditation together in Paris 45 years ago. We studied intensely, there was some spiritual masters. But before that I said, if I’m out of bed, my day is started, I’m running around. So, I am in bed, I pet my cats, they come up for their love.

That’s very calming, I feel like we meditate together because they’re purring away, and I start doing I pretty much tap every day. And then I meditate, I do a meditation and I do something else called The One Command. It’s a practice of going into the theta realm.

And then on my altar, behind me, which you can’t see behind those doors, I always start my day by saying, I’m open. I light a candle and I say, open my path before me, it’s Carolyn B. Casey, who says, open my path before me and grant me the opportunity to be of maximum good in the world. So that’s my deepest intention for every day when I’m with a client. Or I say, may this be for our highest good, guide me to this highest good for that person, for both of us together.

Set Your Soul Towards Connection and Alignment.

So, when you’re talking about not selling, or whatever it seemed, that’s behind even when I go to networking things. Can I meet great people? Can I connect with the people who I need to connect with that will either become friends or great business partners or whatever, but can I just meet great, great people? Who do I resonate with? And then at the end of my day, I have kind of rituals at the end of the day, as well.

Todd: I love that. Thank you for sharing that. I’ve noticed people who are typically, just in my experience for doing this for 33 years. People who have a morning routine, on some level, typically are a little happier, I really do see that. I heard a statement once that really stood out to me. If you win the first hour of the day, you win the day, if you lose the first hour of the day, you spend the rest of the day looking for it. Right?

You were anxious, we’re running late, that kind of thing. And I’m a former drug addict, alcoholic, and my mentor 33 years ago said, Todd, you need to come up with a morning routine, he said the best thing for your recovery will be that. I didn’t really fully believe it when he first told me because I wasn’t a morning person. But it truly has been the single greatest thing, the best gift I’ve ever given myself is kind of similar to some things that you’re doing.

Setting my intent for the day, reading my declaration, imagine my day going the way it needs to go, imagining having this podcast session with you, so to speak. Learning from you, Susan, and all the great things that you’re doing. Putting myself in that mind mindset. It’s awesome. So, when I hear you say that, it doesn’t surprise me that you do something intentional in the morning to get your day going in the right direction.

Getting Yourself Out the Door: Sometimes Starting is The Hardest Part.

Susan: I think it’s important. And sometimes I’m really impatient with it. This morning, I woke up at 5am, and I’m like, Okay, do I go back to sleep? Do I do meditation? Do I get up and get coffee? And even though I didn’t want to do it, I thought I want to prepare for this podcast. And I want to be in the right mindset. So I went through. And you know, once you start – I think sometimes the hardest thing is starting, right?

You can overcome anything if you can get out the door

With Aikido, because it was so hard to go, what I would do, because I’m tired at the end of the day, it starts at six, right? I didn’t want to go. I would put on my gi I would put on my gi and my hakama I would get dressed before that I was tired. You know, like at five o’clock, even though I needed to leave at five thirty because then I would have to get undressed if I wasn’t gonna go. It was part of getting myself out the door. Even though it was really hard, and I was tired and 99% of the time I didn’t want to go.

But 99.9% of the time, I was happy that I went right after, even if it was like super hard. And I was crying in my car. I was still glad that I went but that’s part of the I don’t know, that’s the really hard part.

I heard a yoga teacher talk about this too. She was a teacher and a yoga mat quote unquote, Master, and she’s like, she’d wake up every day, she didn’t want to do yoga. I’m like, Really, this is your life? And she’s like, Yeah, it’s really hard. I’m gonna get up and start with the five minutes, and then see if I can go into a routine. Sometimes I can’t, you know, so I was kind of surprised to hear that, from her, that it was hard for her too because we always think it’s easy for people who we see have some level of mastery.

Acknowledge What You Love About Yourself.

Todd: Love that. Well, a couple things I want to ask you. Some of these are sometimes tough, but what do you love most about yourself?

Susan: Wow. You know what I love most – my BFF just sent me an article on How can you become a creative genius. And I love that she and I are very similar. We met in Paris and became really great friends, best friends. But the number one thing is I’m a curious person. I really am curious and care about others. So that’s what I like about myself. that some people like my sweetie calls it interrogation. He said you captured me by sexy listening.

Todd: I like that.

Susan: I think that’s one of my good qualities, sexy listening.

Todd: That’s a beautiful answer. Thank you for sharing that. I love that. If there’s someone listening to your voice right now that might be struggling. They’re in a dark place. They just are stuck. They’re just struggling right now. What would you tell that one person right now listening to you?

Start With the Smallest Micro Movement and Increase Your Capacity Over Time.

Susan: Movement is so great, to move energy. I think sometimes what happens – and this is this is proven out in research too – when you’re depressed or you’re sad. Movement. I’m an athlete, right? But I had this boyfriend. He started running 12 miles a day and I was running five. And I thought, well, if he can run 12 miles than I can, I can certainly run 12 miles. So, I started upping. I ran when I was at UC Santa Barbara, I ran in the morning on the beach, in the afternoon around the lagoon.

One day, this woman came up to me and she said, I see you running every day. I want to start and I don’t know what to do. And she was pretty heavy, and I said, start by walking a block. One block, because you can do that. And then I forgot about it. I was what, eighteen or something. And I went to visit Santa Barbara a year later. And that woman saw me and came up to me and said, I started walking that block. Now I’m running five miles.

Todd: Oh, that’s awesome!

Susan: Start with the smallest micro movement. And if, for you, just going outside to your gate and back, to get that movement in your body. And then the other thing that I think is so healing Todd, not everybody’s an animal lover, but I think animals are really amazing creatures. I do walk every day, three to four miles, and sometimes I’m super crabby and it’s really hard to walk. I have strategies to do that. But I can tell you, I love all the dogs. I know all the dogs in the neighborhood. And the quickest way to get me out of a bad mood is dog love, because they’re so excited to see you.

How Interacting with Animals Can Increase Your Mood.

There’s this one dog Enzo, who looks deeply – he’s got these gold eyes. He’s a golden doodle. These beautiful golden eyes and I swear to God, he’s the most soulful dog, comes up to me and looks into my eyes, puts his hand on mine, loves me up and gazes into my eyes like Tantra or something. And I just feel like, I’m so happy to pet a dog. Or to have a dog.

I have two cats, but I grew up with dogs. Any kind of animal love, I think it’s really helpful to people who are depressed or sad, or whatever. Because animals just love us, no matter who we are, or what kind of mood we’re in. It doesn’t have to be your own dog or cat.

Todd: That’s great advice. I love that. So, if there’s people out there that want to use your services, they want to get your book, they want to maybe do some one on one media training with you. What’s the best way for someone to do that? You mentioned your website, prsecrets.com. Talk a little bit more about that and then how someone could get in touch with you Yeah,

Susan: Hop on over there. And then there’s, if you want to get in touch with me and create an appointment, I have a link for that. So you can just you fill that out, and we get to know each other that way. And then I have the free things. But the other thing that I think would be helpful to your audience is that I have an opt in, that’s called Create Your Signature Stor y.

If you’re planning to do any media, you have to have your story of origin or your signature story. I have a PDF that is five templates of the most common stories. And you can do it in five minutes, because it’s fill in the blank, and then you can modify it as such, but everybody can get their signature story straight.

If you’re a speaker, if you’re going on a podcast, the first question a podcast host asked is why do you do what you do? So you want to have a story of origin. I actually didn’t tell my story of origin, this time, because we went off in another direction, but I have a number of them to fit different things. So, it’s prsecrets.com/sigpod That’s a great place where anybody can start. And even if you have a signature story, it might inspire you to have another one or another different type. There are more than five types, but these are the five main types. You can do it in five minutes.

True Shield: Verbal Self-Defense for Girls

Todd: I love that. What’s on the horizon for you? Do you got any big plans, any other book coming out or anything like that, something you’re working on that you could share with us?

Susan: I have been really thinking about this a lot lately. I don’t know about another book, I’m going to be working on a TV pilot, I think.

Todd: Oh, really?

Susan: It has to do with martial arts and girls in martial arts. The other thing that I have – somebody just asked me to be on their podcast about this, but we didn’t talk about it. I do have a course for girls, and I was creating one for women, called True Shield: Verbal Self-Defense for Girls, licensing it to schools and organizations and dojos and shelters and those sort of places. So it’s the 10 most difficult or dangerous situations that girls find themselves in, to stay safe. And it teaches them. It’s an in person program, that the teachers or the phys ed teachers, or whoever teaches in schools.

It’s a program, I don’t teach it, it’s already laid out. That’s something that I really would love to revive now that we’re back in person again. And I’m 99% done with that course for women and corporations. I haven’t taught it yet, so that’s sort of like a pilot, but I just wanted to put that there as a future thing. That is available. Listen, if somebody books it, I’ll get it done.

Todd: Right. There you go. And I love that. How that’s so needed right now. I think I love that you’re doing that.

On Being Open to New Ideas and Adventures.

Susan: So, I’m working on that. And just kind of exploring right now at this stage. I’m kind of looking for something a little different. I don’t know, I still love my clients and working with one on one, but I’m not sure, doing a lot of podcasts. And not sure what’s going to be next yet. I’m kind of in that open line state.

Todd: Yeah, gotcha.

Susan: Well, so if anybody has an idea, or, or wants to ping me for anything, I’m open to hearing.

Todd: Wow, I love it. Wow. Well, I have no doubt whatever you decide to do, you will do it. Because, just the way you live your life. And again, I said this earlier today, I’m very impressed by the way you carry yourself. I love that you’re also honest about hey, I still have my struggles, and I still struggle here or there. But yet – I keep coming back to the word – you’re very bold. You call it blunt. I just love that you love asking the questions.

You’re not afraid to ask the questions. I think we need to all be more like that. I’ve learned a ton from you today already. I’m going to be on a TV talk show on Thursday, which I’ve been on quite a bit. But I’ve learned a bunch just by researching you and seeing all the great things you’re doing that’s kind of helped me with that. So, thank you for that. You’ve made me so happy just by sitting here talking to you. Thank you for that, and I love what you’re doing. I want to encourage all of our listeners, after you’re done listening to this, I want you to share this episode with everyone that you know.

Please go get Susan’s book Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul. Let’s help get her message out to more people. If you’re interested in creating your own story and getting that where you want to be, please reach out to her. I’ll have all her contact information in the show notes. And obviously, you can tell she’s very approachable. And you know what she’s not afraid to ask. So, don’t be afraid to ask her, right?

Susan: Yes, yes, absolutely. Thank you. Thank you for being so generous, and you’re so kind to all of your guests. I mean that, really, I think we need more kindness and compassion right now. You really demonstrate that. You know, my BFF, she said this is the year of awe, wonder. And I’m always forgetting the third one. I’m just gonna say adventure. It wasn’t that, but you really represent those things, the capacity for wonder and awe. And you really bring that out in your podcast and for your clients as well. So, thank you for that.

Todd: That means a lot. Thanks. You just made my day. So thank you, thank you so much. And I appreciate all the good you’ve done and can’t wait to get this message out to my listeners and followers. I’m here to support you in any way that I can. Hopefully, we can build a sort of a friendship as we move forward. It’s just great to finally meet you, Susan, again, grateful for all you’re doing. Thank you so much.

Well, there you go. Listeners, I told you that today is going to be great. Susan Harrow, please reach out to her prsecrets.com . And check out all the great things that she’s doing. And please share this episode, like I said, with all your loved ones that are around you who may need a little pick me up and maybe a push in the right direction. Thank you for your support. And again, thanks to my sponsors. I love you guys. And one last thank you to Susan, thank you for being a light in this world that we can all follow.

Susan: I so appreciate you and thank you everyone for listening and being a follower of Todd because obviously you get a lot of fulfillment and enjoyment and encouragement.

Todd: Thank you. That’s beautiful. Till next time, everyone.