How To Relax + Succeed During Media Interviews

How To Relax + Succeed During Media Interviews – Her Success Story Podcast

Ivy Slater: This is a great month, ladies and gentlemen. It is an honor and a joy as we deliver great content during Women’s History Month. And to see amazing women leaders who have continuously made an impact, done interesting things in their background, conquered a few things, navigated a few things and have really succeeded. So, it’s really my joy and honor to highlight Susan Harrow. Susan is a media coach, marketing strategist and martial arts expert. Instead of 15 minutes of fame, a lifetime of legacy is what she believes in and what she stands for. She helps her clients to navigate media interviews and not mess up that ‘big break’ opportunity. So, I could take a seat and tell you all these fun things about Susan, but it will be more fun for Susan and I to chat and you can learn directly from Susan. So, thanks for joining me here today.

Susan Harrow: I’m so happy that you have me here and I love, I always love hearing how people modify the bio a little bit. If I’m not a martial arts expert, I would say I’m a martial artist. I am a black belt in Aikido and my sweetie always teases me. He’s like, because as women students, we had to teach too. And he’s like, you’re a martial arts teacher. I’m like, hardly, no, but I have done a little bit of teaching as part of our growth, which is so different by the way, than actually being the student because you can start to see everything that you don’t know when you’re on the mat, you know, that you think you know. And I think that that was a great lesson for me in terms of really embodying the spirit of martial arts and actually being able to transmit that knowledge, whatever I had, to others.

Ivy Slater: Well, I think you know what, this is so much jumping in the middle, but I love this jump in because I think that’s so true in what we do. You know, we, when we, we guide and teach others, we see so much of what we know and what we want to know more of.

Hearing Is Reflected Back by Your Listeners.

Susan Harrow: And what’s so surprising to me always is when I ask people with my clients and my course participants, I always say, you know, what landed for you? What were the biggest aha’s? What did you, what do you want to take away? And it’s always so, so surprising because most of the time, it’s not something that I plan to say or something I said off the cuff and that I totally didn’t remember. So, hearing reflected back is so important. And it’s so important in a media interview too, because you don’t always know what you think you know. What’s going to land, and then you do media appearance. And it may be it doesn’t take, or the audience doesn’t really connect with it, or they do, or the topic is really hot. So, you get a really great response. So, there’s always that iteration in both modifying what you say and modifying what’s going on and connecting it to what’s going on in the culture today. And I think that’s true in every industry, right? And also in terms of how we learn and understanding what actually is landing with people that we might have thought was brilliant, right? And we like, you know, I’m so brilliant and it just doesn’t resonate. And the opposite is true too, like the thing that you throw off the cup, right?

Ivy Slater: It’s so true. And it’s, it’s, yeah. And I’ll say and if we don’t keep putting things out there, we don’t know. And we have to be willing to be vulnerable in doing that.

Vulnerability Makes Good Media.

Susan Harrow: Yes. And I think there’s there’s vulgar vulnerability and there’s vulnerability that is really depthful and true. And I think our culture has sort of swung into the area of vulgar vulnerability where we’re sharing things that could be pull people into a very dark place or pull us into our darkest place versus really sharing to connect that can be helpful for other people. And that’s always something that I discuss specifically with my clients is: what do you want your end result to be? Not just sharing your stories willy-nilly because it’s something that you feel like, oh, I want to be vulnerable. No, we start with, what does the audience need to know and how can I help? And where do your stories connect with that? And are you telling the story in such a way that can be helpful to people, and then ending with an uplift so you don’t leave people in a dark place?

Ivy Slater: So I think that is, that is so true and such great knowledge. And I truly admire the way you say that because there’s so much cliche out there. We need to show our vulnerability. Yet we want to also move to a positive place in the world and move people to a positive place.

Susan Harrow: Without being toxic positivity, correct.

Ivy Slater: Yes.

Silence Your Inner Critic with Preparation.

Susan Harrow: My friend, Sarah and I, we could talk about like because we support each other a lot and we often call each other when there’s been some sort of disaster, or we’re having a bad day, or whatever. And I said, we should actually do podcasts on this because it’s really funny. Like, all of the hideous heinous things that happen either in our mind. Like, what she was saying when she was about to go on stage. It was a big stage with Annie Lebott and Julia Cameron, big people of her stature. And the night before, she said a chorus of critics were shouting in her head. And we had gone through all of the issues like, what are all of the fears that you have, and what could possibly go wrong. We go through all of the disasters that could happen in any media interview, the worst-case scenario. So, we can create the solutions for them before they happen. And you can’t, you can never predict all of them. But we like to go through all of those and it’s same in a media interview. We go through worst case scenarios. So, you can let go of your triggers and the “oh my God!” response too. We do that. And I think people really need to see that part. Like it’s no, she’s beautiful and she’s radiant on stage, but she didn’t get any sleep the night before because the inner critic said this is stupid. You’ve already given the stock in a word, you know, anything that, that is said, and people see the end result and think, but it’s so easy. And they didn’t know she might have thrown up before.

Ivy Slater: People see the end result and think, but it’s so easy. And you know, they didn’t know she might have thrown up before. So Susan, let’s take a step back. How did you get into this media training? I am listening. How did this become your thing? Part of who you truly are? Which is, which is magnificent, well spoken. And you help others be so clear and well spoken.

Baptism By Fire.

Susan Harrow: So, you know, I think it’s been in my bones since grade school where I would collect quotes. I have a big paper file. I still have writing from third grade quotes. So, that’s sort of the first sound bite, is our quotes, aphorisms, right? And I was fascinated by that and started creating these files, and I was a creative writer and a big reader. And then when I started – I actually have a career in a startup, working at a couple of startups and women and, and only women in a number of industries – I started at a firm that sold automated building controls, smart buildings for hundreds of thousands of Dollars in Silicon Valley. I was really the one of the only women in that industry.

But anyway, I moved from a couple of startups that I worked with and I wanted to, was taking writing classes at Berkeley and one woman in my class worked for the North Face, which does that athletic wear? And she did PR for them. I said, Hey, can I trail you and see what you do? Just come over – and at that time, the internet had not yet happened, so we were faxing, which was miraculous, to do actual faxing, electronic faxing. So, I said, can I shadow you? And I started shadowing her and then she just said, why don’t you do it yourself? And I’m like, well, hey, can I listen to you on the phone? We used the phone then versus the internet. Can I listen to you on the phone? And I listened to the way that she did some pitches and then she said, you do it. So it was baptism by fire. And I started just pitching the North Face. I did the Telluride Film Festival, Bill Graham Presents…

Susan Harrow: And then, my very first client was Missy Park, who was – because she turned her over to me – who is Title IX Sports, one of the largest retailers for athletic wear in the country, when she was just two people at a warehouse. And she started turning over her clients to me. So, I started that. And then as I started gaining clients, and at that time it was artists, authors and entrepreneurs, and now it’s more socially conscious businesses, entrepreneurs, women leaders, people who are really making a difference in the world, and maybe the crazy thinkers, the crazy ones. And so, I booked people on all the best places, like, live, Oprah, all the morning shows, the New York Times, Wall Street Journal. And what I noticed was sometimes what happened was a big nothing. And they said, hey, this didn’t move the dial on my business. It didn’t seem to book… whatever.

Susan Harrow: And I – that was Siri spoke up. I know you heard that, but I don’t know how to turn Siri off. She’s talking about it. Siri, Siri, I have not addressed you, but. . .

Ivy Slater: And so, you know, it’s great because, I know we’re thinking about women this month and we’re highlighting Siri because she talks to us, it’s a ‘she’, she did that. She’s on it. I’m like, good, I’m glad you are Siri, we’re on it too.

Susan Harrow: So… we don’t need any help in this moment.

Craft Messages That Resonate with the Audience.

Susan Harrow: So, I started helping them. I said, let me hear what you have to say. And it really wasn’t something that was going to inspire their audiences to buy or to buy into their point of view. So, I started media training my clients, even though I was just hired to book them as either by them or by the firm that they were with or with the publishing house. And I just loved it so much. I wanted to make that transition and I eventually did. Yeah. To the media training only. So really preparing people for the spotlight, for panels, podcasts, presentations and media. And really crafting those kinds of messages that are going to resonate with the audience while still giving that host or that journalist exactly what they wanted to win, creating that win, but really tweaking whatever they say.

TWEET: Create messages that will resonate with your audience. Whether that’s right now, in the moment, or later on in the future.

Susan Harrow: It had a real effect on their business, either now or in the future, because media interviews can bring you, it can really open up the whole world to you. But oftentimes it brings you the prestige so you can get higher speaking engagements, get a book deal, that sort of thing. But also I wanted to have a real result in your business as much as possible, sooner rather than later. And so we do short term, medium term, long term: what are you saying to make that kind of connection with people who may not be ready to buy now, but who want to engage with you on some level. Does that make sense?

Get Returns on Your Investment With Every Media Interview.

Ivy Slater: Yeah. And I think it’s brilliant because you’re giving your clients an opportunity to see the differentiation between the different platforms we speak on. People think, oh, I have my thing, I could just do it here, there and there. But a media interview is not just about having your speech. There’s a lot of stuff out there that says, okay, we’re going to help you write your pitch, your presentation, you’re this, that and the other thing. But how do you do it that results in the ROI short term and long term? And for those listeners who aren’t familiar, what does that mean? It means return on the investment. Return on the investment of the preparation you’re putting in. Return on the investment of the travel you might be doing, the time you’re putting out. And that’s where your return is about why are you doing this? Well, how does this move your business forward? How does this move the brand forward? What transpires based on if you’re on a panel with a group and what’s the language you’re using there that best translates to the brand ROI for you? Versus a keynote or a breakout session or a media.

TWEET: Every media appearance should give you a return on your investment of time + training. You need to get something back, every single time!

Mastering Yourself to Master the Medium and the Media.

Susan Harrow: And it’s completely different, but it’s all about mastering yourself to master the medium and the media. So, it’s about how do you conduct yourself, how do you interrupt politely or sometimes maybe not quite so politely if need be, right? And certainly on media appearances like panels and on TV, you need to manage your content and you need to manage how you interact with other people in any kind of panel like that. And it’s completely different to a presentation, because in a presentation, you create the energetic with the audience and you manage the content, you manage your body, language and everything on stage. But with the media, you are responsible for the back and forth, and it’s usually very fast. So, you are just responsible for yourself and how you manage yourself given other people’s responses during the media appearance.

Create a Relationship that Translates to the Audience.

Susan Harrow: And by the way, it’s not about memorizing anything. It’s about getting your key messaging down, but then being able to be fluid, to create a relationship – which is so important – that translates to the audience. And then also to be able to not get your message out at the cost of destroying the relationship. I had one client, a very big corporate client who hired me. I watched his media appearance and he got all of his points out, but he missed all of the social cues with the host. And so, I’m like, he got all those great points and I’m like, that’s fantastic, but there was no rapport with the host and he missed all the cues. So everybody’s different in that regard. Some people spend all of their time creating that rapport with the host and then they miss all of their points. So there needs to be a happy medium between those two things, that’s a lot of skill and practice and role play to get to that point of being comfortable in that flow of very fast conversation, which is media conversation. Or a podcast like this, which is maybe a tad slower, but you still have to navigate the personality of the host and manage your time.

Ivy Slater: And so listeners, I want you to take a moment and think about what Susan just said, because I am the interviewer and Susan is the interviewee, the guest. So how is she doing this today? How is she getting her points across? How is she managing her content in the flow of this conversation? I made a faux pas with the martial arts and Susan immediately started navigating that, and then we built together, we brought that back to her business. So, think about this as not just, hey, this is a cool interview, but what Susan is referencing is teaching moments. Very often I’ll say, so what’s your one tip – and I’m going to ask that. But, before I do that, I want you guys as listeners to think: what is the tip that I’ve got? That I’m seeing right before my eyes, right in this interview, and in what Susan is referencing?

Susan Harrow: Well, thank you, I hope I did it in a very full way. I hope I made the correction in a great way. That’s a good point.

Finding Your Positive Vulnerability.

Ivy Slater: Yeah, 100% you did. I’ve been hosting for five years now, right? So I’ve been doing media interviews for close to four and a half, right? We stacked at the beginning because we had no idea how this was going to go. And with those small pieces of information, I know I make mistakes. I’m not perfect. And we used to – in the early days – correct ourselves. Like, no, let’s go back and fix this. Let’s go back and fix this. And now, we go with flow because it’s in that place of positive vulnerability. It’s okay that I’m not perfect out there. I’m a real person, right? And that shows that I’m still working on things. And I have had guests, correct me. Or I’ll ask, hey, how do you say this?

When the Chandelier Falls, Just Keep on Playing.

Susan Harrow: I love that because I think that that’s one way that it’s always been true, but it’s now more true, that we really want to see the behind the scenes of media interviews. And when there are these, quote unquote, mistakes or whatever, bumbles, whatever we want to call them, it’s fresh and new. So, we really love that. We love that. And no matter how much you rehearse, if something happens – like my brother who’s a musician, he travels all over the world. And he said, one of the best concerts ever was when they were in the middle of playing and a chandelier fell down and almost crushed them. And they kept playing. They kept going. They kept playing. Yeah. And they show us the one.

Susan Harrow: And I just heard, oh my gosh, I can’t remember the name of the musician, but I love this so much. I just heard on my Sirius radio, he’s a super popular musician and evidently has Tourette’s and he doing this media interview, and he forgot his lyrics for the song. I guess there’s some part of Tourette’s where his brain got blocked and the audience helped him through it. And I thought that is so beautiful where your community is on your side. And whenever you’re in an audience, whenever you’re speaking on a media interview, the host – and assume that the host and the audience, everyone’s on their side – and they will help you if you are stuck or you bumbled or whatever. It’s their job to make you look good and to smooth things over. And it’s your job to give a beautiful, and inspiring, and seful or educational, or whatever interview and whether you bumble or not, to be able to give them something and have them take something away. Even if it’s like, maybe you didn’t navigate your mistake well and you turned all red, but you still went on, right? Or you still finished? Like there’s there’s something that you said for that as well.

Ivy Slater: And I loved what you said earlier about not memorizing your content.

Keep Your Content Fresh and Alive.

Susan Harrow: Yeah, don’t memorize your content. It’s got to be and fresh and alive. There’s really two philosophies. I was talking to a colleague of mine and I said, listen. When you’re doing lots of podcasts and lots of interviews, you need to tell different stories and make different points. And she said, oh, so and so – I’m not going to name the person – said you should always be making the same point and drill it in because you have different audiences. And I said, I hear the wisdom in that. And I still disagree. Like, I went to someone who’s very famous, and her website and every single podcast was the exact same topic. How many podcasts of those do you think I’m going to listen to? One. Because she said the same thing in every single interview, the same topic. I’m only going to listen to one.

TWEET: You can tell the same story a million times if you learn how to tailor it to every audience.

Susan Harrow: And the other part of that is you actually lose credibility because, if you are telling the exact same stories in the exact same way on every single podcast or media interview we go, she’s a robot, and this isn’t fresh and gosh, can’t she talk about anything else in any way? So, there are key points that you want to make that are really important, but you’re not going to deliver them in the exact same way. And you’re going to use the freshness of what’s going on in the culture today to spruce them up. Or change the ending for your audience. You as a speaker know that you can tell the same story, but have a different point in a different ending, a different epiphany depending on every audience, right? Like you could speak to – you’re speaking to women lawyers. So, you might have these fantastic stories, but you’re going to connect them to women in law, what is relevant to them versus if you’re talking to women who are not going to have a different story or who are cybersecurity or tech, you can tell the same story, but you may have a different twist to that story. And that’s what’s important, to keep it fresh and to make that connection with your audience during your media appearances.

Ivy Slater: So listeners, did you get it? Keep it fresh. Connect to the audience. It’s fascinating. And I am encouraging the listeners to actually dissect this interview and see how Susan is presenting. She heard what I was going to ask before, and she’s giving me information before the question because she knows, and she’s listened to some of Her Success Stories. She knows the flow of the show. And she’s giving me insight into the information that you, as listeners, can actually take something immediately away and take an action on.

Familiarize Yourself with the Medium and the Media.

Susan Harrow: And I appreciate that we are in a flow of conversation, it’s not like I’ve had some media interviews or something, they just ask one question and then go to the next question. And I’ve certainly heard interviews like that too, even with professionals. There’s no follow on or whatever. It’s just like, here’s my list of questions and I’m going to go through them. Versus really listening and seeing where the flow of conversation goes. And the other thing that you said that’s so important to people is whatever medium you’re on is to be familiar with it. Yes, I’ve listened to a number of your podcasts before I came on the show. I wanted to understand your style and your and get an idea of how you were going to ask me those questions. So I’m not caught off guard completely right. And I feel like the more information you have in that regard, the calmer and more relaxed you can be because that’s so important to be relaxed. That’s one of the first things that we see.

Competence Leads to Confidence.

Susan Harrow: Actually, with a lot of my clients, and with one of my clients, she came to me because she had – women often come to me because they’ve lost or lack confidence, where they have imposter syndrome. And these are some of the most talented and amazing women. And one of my clients did that. And so, we’re doing a lot of work on relaxation and gaining the confidence back sort of behind the scenes. And then what she said is after a couple of months, she’s like, that fell away. Like now I’m working on my media content and we were working on focusing on her speaker’s package and we were focusing on her media, her media sound bites and the topics for those and moving forward with that and that sort of fell away. But it does take a lot of practice behind the scenes, both with role play back and forth with actual media interviews and then the work that you do on your own in practicing relaxation. We do neuroscience, mindfulness and martial arts techniques behind the scenes to build your mental and muscle memory and to build your command presence and to build your inner confidence, the competence that leads to confidence.

Ivy Slater: So I’m going to stop you right there. I want to repeat one thing you just said, build your competence to build your confidence.

Susan Harrow: That’s right. And there’s research that shows that that’s how it works. It’s not us going – we as women – going like, you know, I’m going to do that when I’m ready. You’re never ready. We’re never ready for the next step. So, it’s the competence in building the self-trust loop that you can do it that you, build the competence muscle.

Ivy Slater: So listen, you could hear why Susan is so brilliant and so successful in what she does because she is truly taps into her clients and helps their competence, their confidence, their visibility and they have the ability to help their their brands out there and get that return.

Pushing Past Your Plateau To Succeed in the Media.

Susan Harrow: Yes. And to say that, you know, the 10,000 hour thing is 10,000 hours with iteration to be an expert, you know, from Malcolm Gladwell. So each time you’re doing a media interview with clients, what we do is we review it and we say, what did you do well and what will we shift for next time? So it’s a constant learning process and tweaking process. I go over pretty much all of my media interviews to see, well, where did I miss an opportunity? What could I have said better? And you know, sometimes, when we get the transcript of it, I just want to tear my hair out. I’m like, seriously, Susan, that didn’t really make sense. Like, is that what I really said? And sometimes I’ll go back and listen to it to make sure that the transcript was right, so it’s a process of always learning and improving. And the one thing that, that I really love is that constant improvement, to give yourself that pat on the back when you do have a small improvement. Sometimes, it feels like sometimes I would train and train and train and I wasn’t really getting any better and reached a plateau.

Susan Harrow: And then sometimes there’s exponential growth and you can’t really predict it. And you can’t predict it in anyone. And I was talking to my BFF. I have a woman BFF and a male BFF, and I was talking to her, she’s a therapist. And she said, I never give up on people because you don’t know what their capabilities and capacities are. And I said, I know. Like, I had one client, she was the worst storyteller. It was so, she was so snoozy. I was just saying she had won awards. She was highly competent. She had a robust business; she couldn’t actually take on any more business. And her stories were so boring, I could barely keep my eyes open. And I thought that, that I’m like, wow, I really got a big job ahead of me. And suddenly, after like month three, she became a brilliant storyteller. I was like, what? What? So you cannot predict it, you know, where people’s growth points or growth spurts are. So all of you out there, if I’m going to wrap up, just keep moving forward and tweaking and iterating because you don’t know when you’re going to hit the plateau or the growth spurt that then catapults you to the level that you’ve been moving toward all along.

TWEET: The only way to find out if you’ve reached a growth spurt or a plateau in your media appearances is to push through + meet the person who comes out on the other side.

Ivy Slater: I love that. So I want to throw one last thing at you as it is, it is Women’s History Month. And you know, I try to take a little time during this month to think about the women who’ve made impacts on me or the women I’ve admired. You know, the women who’ve helped me become the woman I am today. Good, better, ugly, whatever it is, but it is. What are some of the women that, you know, you reflect back on and have made impacts for you and why?

The Impact of Deep Calm on Your Media Appearances.

Susan Harrow: Well, my BFF Sheila Kapoor, who’s the therapist, we connected, we met in Paris. We are both Au Pairs. And we found some spiritual teachers there where we went very deep into meditation and spiritual practices and really delved into that in the middle of being in a strange country, not knowing the language. And we’ve been BFFs ever since, along with my male BFF as well, who’s a judge in Los Angeles. But one of the things that she taught me, I think, and that we did together, was that kind of persistent training in that mindfulness practice of deep calm. Like, there were so many challenges living in Paris. And once I started doing that meditation more seriously, a lot of things shifted for me. And it wasn’t easy. It wasn’t easy. But I feel like being able to get to that quieter space in your mind where there’s the capacity for all things that are possible – even if you do a meditation practice for two minutes a day, or every hour. One of the things that I do sometimes, not consistently enough, but I recommend that my clients do it. But I want to do it consistently. Once an hour, stop for a minute and quiet your mind. Just focus on your breathing or whatever, you know, feel your body and just take a minute and see if you can clear your mind. Because then when you’re in a media appearance or on stage, you have the ability in an instant to relax, clear your mind and be there, be where you are. And that, to me, I learned that when I was 20 and I still use it today.

Control Your Breath, Control Yourself, Control the World.

Ivy Slater: I love that. And I’m a firm believer, I do this between every media interview. I take three deep breaths, transition from client to client, uncle, phone call, Zoom, Teams, whatever you’re on.

Susan Harrow: And you had us take a breath. I was like, yeah, I need to remember to take a breath because we were in deep conversation before and it’s like, let’s take a breath and sort of clear. We should both sort of reset, you knew it’s important. One breath.

Ivy Slater: My background as a dancer, it’s very important for me to ground before I move forward. And I find, you know, before every podcast interview, I usually chat with my guests for a little bit before, especially this time, and we did and it was fun. And then it’s like, okay, now we’re going into interview mode. So we need to take that breath and ground to move forward. And as we complete this interview, before I go into my next activity, I’m going to take three deep breaths to be present for every activity I do. And that honors myself, even if it’s just the activity of, okay, I’m going to get up today and straighten my desk, I’m going to breathe and then focus on that next. I’m going to, you know, take my three breaths and focus on that next client or that next opportunity of the next conversation.

Susan Harrow: And I love that you bring up the breath because I think that’s really the most important thing in media interviews. There’s a saying, control your breath, control yourself, control the world, right? But it is about controlling yourself. You know, it’s about controlling yourself. And you can do that in one breath, three breaths, calm down the autonomic nervous system. That’s all it takes. And in a media interview too, like if you’re caught off guard, ground, like Ivy says, take the breath. It’s really like two seconds. Nobody’s going to notice.

Ivy Slater: I love Susan Harrow. Thank you so much for joining me today on Her Success Story. This was a blast. It was really a blast. I love it.

Susan Harrow: Thank you so much, Ivy.

TWEET: Before you move on to your next activity, take three deep breaths to refocus.

Ivy Slater: And listeners, Susan, you want to give a shout out for your website that is going to be in the show notes. So listeners, do not panic if you don’t get it all. As Susan says it, just scroll down and it’s here for your resource. Susan, please share.

Ivy Slater: Wonderful. Susan, thank you for joining me. Listeners, if you enjoyed today’s podcast, if you think there was something that resonated for you… I’ll always say, you took the time to listen. Take that deep breath right now and think: what was the one thing that meant something to you, resonated with you, that you want to take forward and form an action around? Feel free to put it in the show, real-time. Feel free to make a note on your phone on a piece of paper. But if you’ve given yourself the time to listen, make sure you’re finding an action to take. As this episode resonates forward and you think it’s helpful, please share it. Share it forward. Give that gift to others. Thanks again for joining us today on Her Success Story. See you next week as we continue with Women’s History Month.

Susan Harrow: It’s prsecrets.com, like public relations. And there are lots of free things for you. I have free videos, free trainings, free PDFs, whatever is the way that you like to learn. And also, if you would like to work one-on-one, I’m open to that. And I have a course called the Zen Of Fame: Your Genius Gone Viral, which is self-paced, which you can do on your own. So, lots of opportunities. They’re both free and engaged further.

Her Success Story is a podcast that allows these impactful and fascinating women to share their success journey with the world. Their triumphs, along with their failures. Their lessons, along with their leadership. And their determination to follow their dreams. Listen in each week as we talk to women in fashion, coaching, corporate, legal and so much more. You can connect with Ivy Slater here.

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